About Wayne
Out of the Closet
What many people won’t know about me is that I was married to a woman before coming out as gay. Accepting my sexuality was by far the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life and it’s not always been a straightforward path.
Beyond the portrait
My upbringing wasn’t easy, I was raised by a single mum on benefits on a not very nice council estate in South East London (thankfully now demolished!). This presented challenges for me around opportunities, access to education and services.
Growing up in the 80’s in London, there were no gay role models, nobody in my life to ask questions and no internet. I did what I thought I had to do and that was get married to a woman, have a family, make a home, not realising that there was a whole other part of me that I needed to embrace to be my real, authentic self.
This eventually happened after almost 10 years – there’s an analogy that living a secret life is like a pot of boiling water; you can keep an eye on it and make sure it doesn’t boil over and for the most part just watch it, but if it starts boiling over then you’re in trouble. I could sense my ‘pot overboiling’ in 2010 and took the decision to end my marriage and live my true life. Not always easy but I know that I’m happier being honest with myself when I look in the mirror.
Embracing the power of my difference
The positive of my lived experience is that it gives me an understanding of life on 2 different sides, helps me to understand people who face challenges in similar situations, whether that’s regarding sexual orientation, gender, faith or other non-visible protected characteristic. It gives me a more balanced view on life – you never know what someone may be dealing with.
Building #BraverCultures
One of the ways I have worked at building braver cultures is to encourage conversation, both within teams across the business but also with me. I have taken the time to show that I wasn’t the ‘red card police’, waiting to trip people up and blow a whistle the second somebody used an outdated term, or asked for help with understanding an inclusion initiative. This has taken time and trust, which is a two-way relationship. I’ve shown that you can be curious, you can make mistakes. None of us are perfect, as long as you are respectful and inclusive in your approach. Brit have really come a long way in a short time!